Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Scariest Thing I've Ever Read...

And I don't mean bad books, scary things that lack plot, character and misuses 'everyday'. No, I mean, too scared to keep reading because what's going on in those pages makes your skin crawl, makes you forget to breathe, makes you turn on the television for company, makes your fingers so sweaty that they leave impressions on the page, makes you say your bedtime prayers for God's protection, makes you lock the doors and secure it with a five-gallon water bottle and then place the titanium Big Bertha at the foot of your bed and wish you owned a pit bull named Otto?

It by Stephen King. Damn that Pennywhistle and his nickel-colored eyes and even that stupid giant spider at the end.

Raven: the Story of Jim Jones and His People by Tim Braithwaite. How can someone have that much control over another? How can someone stomp, literally stomp, on the Bible like that and say that he's God? I actually had to stop reading, literally stop reading, until the next day at the scene where he implores the mothers to stop crying and just give their babies the drops of cyanide-tainted Flavor-Aid.

What are the scariest things you've read?

Joke of the Day

Courtesy of Murderati.com:

How many screenwriters does it take to change a light bulb?

1st draft. Hero changes light bulb.
2nd draft. Villain changes light bulb.
3rd draft. Hero stops villain from changing light bulb. Villain falls to death.
4th draft. Lose the light bulb.
5th draft. Light bulb back in. Fluorescent instead of tungsten.
6th draft. Villain breaks bulb, uses it to kill hero's mentor.
7th draft. Fluorescent not working. Back to tungsten.
8th draft. Hero forces villain to eat light bulb.
9th draft. Hero laments loss of light bulb. Doesn't change it.
10th draft. Hero changes light bulb.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Blog White Noise

Sorry for not posting. I'm working on two projects that I need to get out SOON. They're taking all of my brain power. So I'll be back soon!